Dealing With Infidelity - Do You Ever Get Over An Affair?

If you are in the throes of dealing with infidelity in your marriage, you may be wondering if you'll ever get to a point of having a healthy, loving relationship or is your relationship doomed for good. You will never forget the affair, it will always be a part of your history, but with time and commitment to rebuilding the marriage, not just time alone, time together, you can survive the affair.

If you are in a position of working to survive infidelity, and your cheating spouse is committed and willing to do the necessary work of rebuilding your marriage, then you will move past this setback and get to a place where you two are emotionally and physically connected again. But first you need to have a basic understanding of what steps will help you to reach that goal.

When you think of getting over the affair, consider how willing your spouse is to be transparent and completely honest with you. Ask yourself:

- Has your spouse owned up to what he had done, change the behavior and be held accountable?

- Is your spouse willing to truthfully explore what he has done and why he has done it?

- Is he truly committed to working on the marriage and are all other parties out of the picture for good?

- Has he apologized and acknowledged the deep pain he has caused you?

- Is your spouse willing to do the difficult work of rebuilding the marriage?

- Is he truly remorseful and is he actively seeking help such as getting counseling?

Learning to trust after the affair is another hurdle to overcome when you are dealing with infidelity in your marriage. So the two of you have to work together to rebuild the lost trust by being completely honest, open and accessible to each other, both emotionally and physically. A relationship is built on trust, even after an affair. Without it you might as well end the relationship.

Sometimes when you are in the thick of things, you can get so bogged down in the sadness and heartache that it's hard to see that there is some beacon of hope for your marriage. Do you ever get over an affair? That depends on the couple involved. If your spouse is willing to make the effort to change, you will see he has changed over time. This will help you to move forward and further away from the raw pain you're feeling. Yes, dealing with infidelity can and does get easier if you both really work on it. If you both take appropriate actions to heal your marriage you will feel better and better as time goes on.