How To Save A Marriage That Has Experienced Emotional Adultery

If you have experienced the pain of emotional adultery, you are not alone. Because "emotional adultery" can be hard to define, and even harder to prove, it may be difficult to work through. But don't despair, there is hope in saving your marriage. Working through the hard feelings of an infidelity can cause a husband and wife to cleave together and rebuild a relationship that is even deeper and more meaningful than before.

Healing after emotional adultery

It's important to recognize upfront that the healing involved will be a process. Allow yourself to grieve the loss of trust and confidence that you had in your spouse as a result of their emotional infidelity while recognizing that forgiveness will eventually be necessary for your marriage and, most importantly, for you. While you should never accept blame for the wrong that was committed, it helps to remember that we are all imperfect people prone to selfishness. Every one of us is capable of hurting the ones we love. Whether your spouse admits it, or is hardened by pride, odds are they are feeling guilt inside for the hurt they've caused you.

Restoration after emotional adultery

If you and your spouse are in agreement, seeking the help of a counselor is ideal. A marriage counselor can be a wonderful asset in helping you both learn to communicate. Establishing boundaries may be another important part of the process. While it will obviously be necessary to end the adulterous relationship with the "other person," it may also be helpful in rebuilding trust to set some concrete boundaries regarding relationships with the opposite sex in general, such as no lunch dates in your absence, no private meetings, etc.

While an infidelity of any type is never excusable, often it can be found that somewhere along the line a breakdown in communication occurred preceding the emotional adultery. Learning to communicate better, being assertive about your need for time together and for regular intimacy can all go a long way to empower both parties in a marriage. Learning to improve your relationship can serve as a safeguard against future emotional infidelity and other marital problems.