Some people say the A.A. should stand for Attitude Adjustment, and that is exactly what has to happen if a person has any chance at all at staying sober for any length of time. Here are some tips to help you get to an attitude of gratitude.
1. Make a gratitude list. I suggest leaving the keyboard, and writing this out the old-fashioned way with pen and paper. If you are having trouble coming up with things you are grateful for, think about some really big things like breathing, eating, eyesight, friends and so on. Even if you don't really feel grateful, write them down anyway, and in the process, you may find your attitude adjusting.
2. Drop blame. Remember, if you are pointing your finger at someone else, you have three fingers pointing back at you. It is difficult to feel grateful if you are a victim. When you are able to own your own part in any life situation, then you have an opportunity to make changes. Accountability and ownership creates gratitude.
3. Gratitude is an action word. If you are feeling grateful, do something about it. If you are grateful for your sobriety, then go to a meeting and help set up chairs. If you aren't really feeling grateful, but you do the action anyway, your attitude will likely shift to gratitude.
4. Shift focus from negative to positive. This is easier said than done if you have a lifetime of seeing only the negative, but it can be done with conscious effort. Here is an example: if the man in front of you buys the last muffin that you wanted at the cafe - shift from disappointment or anger to being grateful that you will not starve to death in Canada, that you are in a warm cafe, that you have money in your pocket for coffee, that there are still oatmeal cookies left. Challenge yourself and your old thinking on the spot - what is good about this?
5. Give thanks. Whatever you are grateful about, give thanks. Look for reasons to give thanks. Did someone let you in to traffic, hold open a door, make you dinner, not charge you interest or give you a big hug when you needed it? Tell them 'Thanks'. And throughout the day, recognize where all of the good things in your life are coming from - your higher power. Let Him/Her/It or Them know how you feel. And if your not feeling grateful, let your higher power know that you are grateful for the opportunity to know that you don't feel grateful.
These are 5 little suggestions that will assist in your shift from ungrateful to grateful. Don't underestimate the power this has to help keep you sober!
My name is Jane Derry, see more about what I do at
http://www.ahomeaway.org I am an addictions specialist.
Don't give up 5 minutes before the miracle happens.