"Break the rules Michael? I couldn't do that!" Of course
you could. In fact, I'd suggest your rules are precisely
what keep you from having what you want in life.
When I say "rules," I mean:
your ingrained ways of thinking.
your hidden assumptions.
your habits.
your misplaced generalities.
Rules might also include that which you call "common
sense." One of the greatest rule breakers ever, Albert
Einstein, wrote "common sense is the collection of
prejudices acquired by age 18."
Are you feeling "stuck?" Are you in a rut? Can't find a
solution to an ongoing problem or challenge? If so, like
many of my clients, it's probably one of your rules keeping
you that way.
Here's a simple example. A client - who I'll call Janice -
really wanted to begin an exercise program, but she had
written it off as impossible due to her busy schedule.
In our conversations, Janice would say things like "that's
just the way it is," or "it's out of my control." As I
questioned Janice further, it became clear one of her
rules was "I have to go to a gym to workout."
Now that may sound silly to some people, but for Janice,
all she knew was "I have to go to a gym to work out, and
I don't have time to go to a gym." Like a horse with
blinders on, it's all she could see.
"Janice, who says you have to go to a gym to exercise?"
Light-bulb-aha moment for sure. As soon as Janice let go
of that little rule, she was able to consider the many
other options available to her.
Further, by letting go of this particular rule, Janice
began walking each morning with her younger sister. The
two had drifted apart in recent years, and Janice wanted
to strengthen that relationship.
Here's another example of breaking rules, although a
fictional one. In a recent "Seinfeld" episode, the
character George Costanza discovers if he simply does the
opposite of what he'd usually do in a given situation,
he'll get the outcome he desires in that situation.
George goes for a job interview with the New York Yankees.
When he meets the team owner, George tells him what a
lousy job he's done managing the Yankees. Instead of being
polite and professional, as he usually would, George is
rude and obnoxious. Naturally, he gets hired.
I don't recommend you follow George's lead... not
totally anyway. It certainly wouldn't hurt to look at some
of your own rules though. Look especially in the area(s)
where you feel stuck or in a rut.
It might also help to talk it out with someone who's
trained to help you find solutions and move forward, such
as a coach. As one of my other clients recently told me,
"I appreciate your honesty and directness in pointing out
things that I've had "blinders" on to."
Ready to break some rules? Go ahead. You can do it. As
Thomas Edison said: "hell, there are no rules herewe're
trying to accomplish something." It may be the only
difference between a life that's so-so and a life that's
amazing.
It's Your Life! Make it great.
About the Author
Michael D. Pollock is a Personal Coach. He works with small
business owners to help them build their business without
selling themselves or "selling out" on themselves. Visit
his website at http://www.michaeldpollock.com.
Subscribe to his popular ezine "It's Your Life!" by sending
a blank email to ItsYourLife-Subscribe@topica.com.