"Rehab is for quitters". I saw it on a t-shirt the other day. A clever little play on words that pokes fun at addiction. I don't think it's funny, but then I'm here on the front lines.
What is rehab anyway? What does it mean to go to rehab? What is it like there? What happens? Who needs it? Nowadays most people have heard of, or seen the television show Celebrity Rehab. I admit I have never watched a whole episode, just a few minutes here and there, as that was all I could take. In the clip I saw, a counsellor had locked herself in her office crying, while a man having obvious trouble with his facial muscles and his ego (he wanted his mp3 player), yelled at her through the locked door. Chaos and drama abounding, what the addict loves.
On the other end of the spectrum is the government run 'spin dry'. The justice system often offers a choice of jail or rehab. Government funded treatment centers are filled with people not really interested in getting clean and sober, and drug use abounds there. British Columbia's choice to move to the Harm Reduction Model means that if you use or drink while in government rehab, you don't have to leave. Imagine the chaos and drama. The person who really wants to be free of his or her addiction has a lot of competition for attention.
So rehab - spoiled rich kids or the street entrenched. Is that what comes to mind for you when you think about rehab? There is a third choice, but we are not in the public eye. We don't want to be. We are small, private facilities functioning without chaos and drama. Let me paint you a picture of what a quality private rehab retreat offers. Small numbers are best - 8 being the most effective size for a group dynamic.
Private bedrooms allow for quiet time and personal space. Fresh healthy meals prepared with thought and care, served in a dining room in a family style. A loving dog provides a soft warm place to share your pain and joy with. The setting is a specially chosen place, filled with energy and light, a brilliant view of the lake with hawks and eagles soaring and song birds harmonizing with the wind chimes.
There is yoga, and art, and massage therapy, drumming and meditation. The sweeter parts of rehab. The other part is the hard work. Going into those dark places takes courage and determination and a whole lot of guidance and love. Rehab is not about alcohol and other drugs, it is about hurt children, broken relationships, broken trust, and sadness and grief and anger and shame. In a safe place people are able to face and process the pain inside. They face the demons, chaos and drama inside, and move to peace of mind and freedom and joy.
Sometimes, even in the midst of such a beautiful and warm healing place, some people aren't prepared to go the distance. Today a lovely woman chose to abandon recovery. She touched that painful dark place inside, closed back up and ran. She couldn't or wouldn't do it. With the best support and kindness, professional guidance available to anyone, she chose to stay in the pain. My prayers are with her tonight as she reunites with her poison. No, rehab is not for quitters.
Jane Derry
A Home Away Retreat - Rethink Rehab & Addiction
http://www.ahomeaway.org