by: Marilyn J. Tellez, M.A.
I often talk to people casually about their lives and jobs. (That is always a way to start a conversation. We ask the question: "What do you do"? often in our culture.)
Though I want to counsel or coach people about their lives and careers as a career coach, I do not buttonhole people just to make them buy my services. As above, it's usually what we talk about when we don't have other quesitons or answers to give about ourselves when we are initiating a conversation.
What does this have to do with trust? I find that after the beginnings of a mutual conversation about jobs or careers, the other person will switch to how they like or dislike their lives and jobs. They, invariably tell me about themselves and how they really feel.
The person talking to me often goes further in describing their true feelings. What doesn't happen, though, is any kind of solution based dialogue from the other person, if they are frustrated by their lives or jobs. The people who are satisfied with themselves and their jobs talk about other subjects.
The dis-satisfied person stops and does not trust me to probe further. I believe it is because trust for this kind of person is an issue. When a "semi-dis-trustful" person can go beyond the obstacle they have inside themselves, can a true conversation begin. It might take a few casual conversations to have this kind of person become genuine and trusting of others in the job game.