by: Monica M. Burns
Ladies have you come home from a long hard day at work only to find your estranged or current partner hiding in your bushes, parked in his car further down the street with binoculars watching your house, hiding behind the neighbors tree or just blatantly sitting in your house waiting on you! If you answered yes to any of these questions.....................honey he is a stalker.
There is nothing cute or loving about a spouse (estranged or current), watching your every move. It is stupid and dangerous. Some women mistake this type of behavior as him “really loving her.” He doesn’t love you. He wants to control you and everything that you do. Most times the results of stalking are tragic and it’s not a game. If you have broken off a relationship and he just absolutely refuses to accept it and always wants to “talk about it,” he is very unstable and will more than likely become a stalker.
According to The National Center for Victims of Crime, 1 in 12 women will be stalked in their lifetimes, 87% of stalkers are men, and 81% of women stalked by a current or former intimate partner are also physically assaulted by that partner.
Some signs to look for in a stalker are: Following you and showing up wherever you are, Repeatedly calling you including hang-ups, Damaging your home, car, or other property, Using technology such as hidden cameras or global positioning systems to track wherever you go, Threaten to hurt you, your family, friends, or pets and they will also go so far as to find information about you by utilizing public records, online search services, and private investigators. Source: The National Center for Victims of Crime.
Never accept forceful and controlling behavior from your partner. If he jokingly tells you that “he’s never letting you leave him” he really means it and it’s no joke to him. You’ll see that once you leave him and the stalking begins. What are you going to say and think then, “He said he was never letting me leave him, but I didn’t think he was serious.” When you have finally realized the seriousness of the situation, sometimes it’s too late.
So if you are presently experiencing any of the above and need assistance, contact The National Center for Victims of Crime at 1-800-FYI-CALL and always alert friends and family.
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Monica M. Burns
© 2005 Monica M. Burns. All Rights Reserved.